Wisdom & Chocolate with Bets Danko

Beyond The Planner

Bets Danko Season 4 Episode 159

The choice is yours.  Are you going to stick to your tasks? It's totally up to you. You can be the person you can always trust, or you can be the person who drops the ball. It's totally up to you. How motivated will you be when you get the first thing done? How motivated you will be when you realize that doing tasks for you holds more value than just getting things done? It’s time… do what it takes to prove you can trust yourself. Prove that what you say is true.  When you can do that with yourself, it amplifies the relationships you have with other people.

Wisdom and Chocolate is a common sense approach to Mindset Development, Self Empowerment, and Happiness. The real transformation in life begins with Celebration….so grab your coffee and chocolate…It’s time to Celebrate You!

Highlights:

Messy House - Messy Mind

The Leglifts and The Toothbrush

Don’t Wait For Company

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Bets Danko:

Bets, Danko, it's time to combine a guilty little pleasure with a new healthy habit. Kick up your feet and listen in. This is wisdom and chocolate. This is bets Danko, and you are listening to wisdom and chocolate, and today we're going to be talking about organizing your life, and I know that might be an overwhelming topic for you. There are a lot of people out there who have a lot to organize, and I am one of those people. I think that it's part of being human, actually having things to organize and reorganize and revisit to organize throughout your life. Now I recognize that this could be also a dry subject for some people, like, I don't want to hear about organizing my life, right? Maybe it's something you just don't want to do. And I get that, but stick with me, because there are going to be some really easy things that we're going to talk about that can really change your life. So we're going to be going beyond the planner today. Yes, I am all for using a planner and making sure you're blocking out time and getting things done by understanding what exactly needs to be done. I'm all about that, but there are things that can be done outside of your planner, things that you can make as habits, so that you can just get them done automatically that we need to talk about and we need to get in your life. The thing that we need to recognize is that that old saying about a messy house is an indication of a messy mind. However, the phrase goes right is so true. Most of the people that I know who have a mess in their homes, they got a lot going on upstairs, and it's not always something that is helpful for them. In fact, many times what's going on in their minds is actually what causes the mess that is in their homes and their offices and their cars. When you've got a lot of stuff going on in your head, you're constantly thinking and worrying and wondering and not understanding where you stand, where you're headed when all of that stuff is always going on your your home and your car are going to reflect that. So if you're feeling like life is out of control, life will be out of control in your living spaces and your workspaces. If you're feeling like you never seem to be able to zero in on any particular task, then there are going to be 50 million tasks sitting in front of you in the form of a mess that prove what it is that you're thinking. See, here's another thing about the human mind. We have this lovely way of proving ourselves right. In fact, everything we do in life is sort of for the end of feeling as though we know exactly what's going on, because we've just proven that we're right. So if you say to yourself, my life is a mess, well then you're going to create a mess so that you can prove that you're right. We all have a need to feel as though we are an expert at something, that we're right about something, and even if it's not healthy, we'll go out of our way to prove ourselves, right? But if you're looking at your life right now, and you're looking at the mess that's going on externally, it's time to look internally and figure out what is going on. That mess in front of you is a mirror of your mind, right? This is something you really need to look at. Now, I just getting over a bunch of construction done, reconstruction done in my office. There was a lot of water damage. There was a wall that was totally ripped apart, sub flooring that had to come out. There was a leaking pipe, basically. And so mold became an issue throughout the whole building, so we had to get rid of the source, and in getting rid of the source, we needed to protect me so that I could continue working. So there was a lot of plastic that was put up. There were a lot of fans that were used. There was, there was a lot going on to make sure that I wasn't exposed to all of that mold, and the exposure that I might get was absolutely minimal, but in doing that, we also need to make sure that the things that I work with that are normally kept in the back of the building were kept safe and as mold free as they possibly could be. And I phrase it that way, because mold took hold before we knew it was there. That meant that spores were already on the things that were in this building. So even as I moved things forward, it was more so they wouldn't get worse, not to make sure that they never got the mold. So my life was. Chaos. It was chaos on a physical level, as I'm fighting off my immune response to all of this mold. And then chaos in a physical way, because all of this stuff was moved into this part of the building, and I couldn't do my regular photo shoots. It was difficult to get a lot of my work done, because every time I needed to do something, I had to move it out of the view of the camera, and so my life became chaotic, and of course, it stemmed from me needing to react to what was going on at the back of the building. So sometimes the mess that's going on in your head is caused by external factors. It's not just you, right, but that doesn't change how it plays out in your everyday life. It can still be disruptive, and certainly it was, but now, as we've opened everything up, I'm able to shift and move things so that it feels more open, so that I feel as though my mind is less cluttered, and so I am actually feeling clearer in my mind and more motivated to get things done. So these two things work hand in hand, and it's important not to discount either side. What's going on in your home or in your business needs to be tended to. What's going on in your mind needs to be tended to, because when you are more motivated and empowered, you are more likely to get things done. So as we take ourselves away from the planner, recognize the planner stuff isn't going to work if the messy mind is still there, or if the mess is still everywhere else. In fact, the chances of you accomplishing the things on that planner diminish with every new mess that goes on inside your head. Now I want to tell you a little bit about what my life has been like lately. This whole last month has been unusual in that I've had a lot of traveling that I've been doing. I've been getting a lot of guests here at the house, and there have been so many things going on inside the family, a lot of changes and transitions. And so this was not a normal month, but I chose to take part in the craziness, because I wanted to see friends, I wanted to see family. I wanted to be around some of the transitions to make sure that everybody was okay, like I made choices to get myself in the fray and get my mind in a more messy state. But there was also a good thing that came out of this. You see, sometimes when there's something to do, it seems very small, and so we sort of push it aside. No problem, it's a small thing. I'll get it done later. But then another small thing comes about, and you're pushing that to the side, and then another thing, and you're pushing that to the side until you've got this whole mountain of things that need to get done, and then all of a sudden, this tiny little task becomes something altogether too big to finish in an afternoon. But now you've got guests coming, or if this was a work situation, now, you've got a very big meeting coming up, or the team is headed out in order to analyze what's going on with the work, right? There is a big event that makes it so that you've got a deadline to get things done. So because I had company in my home, I'll go with that example. There's a room that is used for storage for all of the things that are used at my live retreats. And this room is mildly clean. I mean, it's not like a huge mess all the time, but when there's been an event, all of a sudden things have come out of the closet, and things have gotten spread out and then moved out to the event and then brought back. And so things kind of get in disarray. To build on that it is a guest room, or at least it has been, historically a guest room. But this year, because of differences going on inside the house, there were actually two mattresses in the room and a bigger bed than normal, and extra blankets and extra pillows and extra this and extra that. And so when I needed to prep this particular room for one of the guests, it was not just a matter of put on new sheets and vacuum the floor. This was a five hour endeavor get all of the things put away from the retreats, this broken shelf that we haven't attended to that needs to be fixed, the bed needs to be put together. So basically, in the long run, having a deadline made it so that I actually got the room clean and got all of the business stuff taken care of, and all of the extra little things that were saved for later were finally done. Having a deadline is absolutely a miracle for finding success when you're trying. To clear up the messy mind or the messy work area. So when you don't have people coming to visit, or you don't have a big meeting coming, what do you do? So this is when you go back to the planner, and you actually put on the planner something that needs to be done, like invite people over, plan the meeting, get it on the planner so that you have to get these tasks done. And here's the deal, maybe even choose the one area that needs the most work so that you get a huge amount of accomplishment done in a short amount of time. Think of how empowered that will make you. Think of how that will motivate you to get even more done. This is a beautiful way of keeping yourself on task and making sure that you get things done. But if you can also try making it a promise that you make to yourself and you can live up to that, then you prove to yourself that you're trustworthy, that you can get things done, that you are worthy of the responsibility of taking care of your own life. Now I call that the house guest edge. When you get a little bit of an edge, because you know that people are coming and you got to take care of it. So when you're when you're promising yourself, that's the personal promise edge, but you have to prove to yourself that you're trustworthy, or else that edge doesn't exist. So make sure when you're putting it on your planner, or you're planning to get it done outside of your planner block time, that you actually do it. You actually take the time. I want to talk about the L O, V O, or lovo Swiss made coconut milk chocolate. I don't know if I've talked about this before, to be honest with you, this is a chocolate that was a complete surprise for me. I had no idea it was going to taste so good. This is vegan, non GMO, my Climate Neutral chocolate. It comes with not just the coconut milk, but you can get it in almond milk, you can get it with oat milk. And it is so creamy. It is so good. It's one of those chocolate bars you just don't want to put down. And not only that, when you put the chocolate in your mouth, you savor it. You hold on to it. You don't just go, Okay, I'm eating chocolate, and just chow down. You want it to last like, this is an amazing chocolate. Now, this is, like, way up on on the top of my list of yummy chocolates and and it definitely is one that we need to look at as we continue to talk about organization. And the reason I'm saying we need to keep this in mind is because it's the perfect way to reward yourself to have the yummiest, creamiest, healthiest chocolate you can at the end of a day when you've accomplished something. Now, there might be some who say, No, it needs to be all day long. I just need to chow down on chocolate to keep myself going. But no, save it to be savored. Save it as a way to reward. Save it as a way to show yourself that you can accomplish things. You can get things done simply because you want to, not because you're trying to get the houseguest edge on your side. Now I want to talk about getting things done simply for the approval or the comfort of others. And the thing I want to bring up is actually a question, why would you not be doing these things for the comfort of or approval of yourself? What is it that makes it so that you're trying harder when other people are involved like this is something that you really need to look at you really need to understand what is it about the other people that you're not recognizing in yourself? Because here's the deal, you are other people to someone else. When you're doing the block organizing on your planner, stick to it. Do it. Make a commitment and really follow through. One of the things that I've been doing is adding tasks to things that already are getting done, like brushing my teeth in the morning. I'm going to share this with you. I brush my teeth with an electric toothbrush. It goes for two minutes before it gives me a notification that, okay, you've got two minutes done. That's 30 seconds on each quadrant of my mouth. So that's a good amount of brushing, right? And what I do is I do leg lifts while that brushing is going on. It's a good solid 60 leg lifts on each side, so that two minutes pass, and I've not only brushed my teeth, but I've worked my. Glutes and my legs and everything just feels really great in my lower back before I even start my day, and then again, at the end of the day, I just added a task that's healthy for me to an everyday activity that I needed to get done. This is a great way to accomplish more than if you're just going for one task at a time without overworking yourself. It's important that we don't do too much, but that we do enough. The other thing is that grab and drop method, where you're picking something up on your way to doing something else, making sure that you're setting yourself up for success as you're going on to your next task. And I call it that because say, you've got something you need to take upstairs, but you don't want to go upstairs yet. When you take it, you grab it, bring it with you, and you just drop it at the bottom of the stairs. It's there for you when you're ready to go up. And that was really super helpful. When I was cleaning that extra guest room. I didn't want to have to keep going up and down the stairs, but it was, you know, difficult to really focus on getting everything together at once, because there were other tasks that need to be done. So when I was dropping as I went, I was setting myself up for being able to just grab everything, go upstairs and get everything done at once. It was super, super helpful. The other thing that you can do is phone reminders, set your phone to tell you when you need to get certain things done. Phone reminders, planner reminders, your your computer, reminding you notes that you put up inside your home or inside your office. All of these things are really helpful for keeping yourself on track and organized so you are in control of things. You are the one who makes a choice of whether or not you're going to stick to your tasks. It's totally up to you. You can be your own superhero. You can be the person that you can always trust, or you can be the person who drops the ball. It's totally up to you, but don't you think it'll feel much better if you live up to the commitments you make to yourself, and if you're not just waiting to give yourself that houseguest edge, you're getting things done because they need to get done. How motivated you will be when you get the first thing done? How motivated you will be when you realize that doing tasks for you holds more value than just getting things done. It helps you to realize you can trust yourself. It helps you to realize that what you say is true, and when you can do that with yourself, it amplifies the relationships you have with other people. With that don't wait for company. Do things for you. Make sure that you're not just blocking time out on your planner, but you're giving yourself extra things to do on top of the stuff that's already getting done, like leg lifts while you are brushing your teeth, or other exercises while you're getting ready to fall asleep, little things like that, just adding tiny tasks throughout the day can really make the difference in getting yourself to a place of motivation and empowerment by getting the tasks done. Everyone has something beautiful to bring to the world. And with that in mind, I designed energy daily. In Energy daily, I help you slow down and pay attention to what's going on in your life so that you can find value at every turn and design a life that's more fulfilling. So do a little extra. Check out energy daily on betsdanko com, and sign up today. Experience the wisdom that helps to motivate and empower you in relationships, business, family and most importantly, self celebration, getting the picture, it's wisdom and it's all about you want to hear the chocolate tune into wisdom and chocolate weekly you.

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