Wisdom & Chocolate with Bets Danko


August 31, 2022 Bets Danko Season 2 Episode 74
Wisdom & Chocolate with Bets Danko
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Wisdom and Chocolate is a common sense approach to Personal Development, Self Empowerment, and Happiness. Avocado and Cherry Mousse is the centerpiece of our Chocolate Moment this week!  Join Bets for some good old fashioned pep talks while rocking the kitchen with healthy recipes that satisfy that chocolate sweet tooth!! The real transformation in life begins with Celebration….so grab your chocolate…It’s time to Celebrate You!


The Wisdom…Amplify The Inner Voice That Says You Are Amazing

  • Pep talking and pep walking
  • Love the little children
  • Celebrate the little things

The Chocolate…Take Control Of You In A Loving, Giving, And Graceful Way

  • Avocado and cherry mousse
  • Thinking long term
  • Getting the bills in order

The Celebration Moment…When Fear Creeps In It Is Super Important That We Go…”Uh Uh…Not Today, I’m Leading With Love.”

  • Fear is not your friend

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Cherry Mousse

3/4 Cup frozen pitted cherries
1 avocado, pitted and peeled
2 tbsp raw honey
1/2 cup crushed ice
1/2 cup goat milk
2 tbsp cacao
2 tbsp shredded coconut

1. Add all ingredients to a high speed blender and blend until it reaches the light and fluffy consistency of mousse.

2. Put in dessert cups, sprinkle with coconut and serve. Serves up to 4 people.

For this and more gluten free recipes from Bets Danko, head over to the website! 


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It's time to combine a guilty little pleasure with a new healthy habit. Kick up your feet and listen in. This is Wisdom. & Chocolate. My name is Bets Danko and you are listening to Wisdom & Chocolate. I am super honored to have you here with me today, listening to a little bit of wisdom, Allah bets and following that up with a lot of chocolate, and today's super healthy chocolate. So this is going to be a really good day. Today, our main topic is Amplify. I just want to take a moment to ask you to share this podcast with a friend. Give the gift of self celebration to the people who are closest to you in your life. Go ahead and take a moment and share this podcast. So I don't know if you're gonna be able to hear it. But in the background, there's a whole lot of noise going on. In fact, it's it's dogs. Dogs are barking, and they are certainly amplifying their voices as best they can. They're rocking it. They're owning it like big time. And these aren't even my dogs. I have three dogs. Two of them are guard dogs, not for humans. I'm not into that kind of thing, but their guard dogs for goats. And then we have another dog who's just kind of a mutt. He's a super sweet mutt. We really love him. But those aren't my dogs barkin'. They're somebody else's dogs, and they're really wanting to make sure that everybody knows that they are there and owning their space. And that's pretty much what we're recognizing - is that they are owning their space. So, you know, hey, rock on dogs, you're doing exactly what you need to be doing in order to amplify your lives. And today, when we're talking about our wisdom moment, we're going to be talking about amplifying your life. So they're kind of, you know, introducing the subject, which is really, really lovely. But the wisdom moment today is, "Amplify The Inner Voice That Says You Are Amazing." And why do we want to amplify that? Well, because it's true. That's kind of the way things work. And as we're talking about amplifying that inner voice, we definitely want to acknowledge some really important things that go along with that, like pep talks. Pep talks are super, super awesome, especially when they come from you. Now, pep talking is something that doesn't always come naturally to a person, you know, just kind of sit there and go, "Okay, you got this, everything's gonna be fine. You're gonna be, you know, just amazing at this." You know, we it's not really that. I don't know, we don't know, normal. We'll call it normal. But in my world, it's normal. And it keeps me going and keeps me happy. You know, I'm my first line of defense for fighting fear and anger and frustration and all of that kind of thing. And how am I going to do that? I'm going to pep talk, I'm going to tell myself everything is going to be okay. Pep talking leads to pep walking and so I want to lead a really awesome life and walk in a way that gives me even more confidence so that I feel happy as I'm moving through the day. Let's face it, the less confidence we have, the more frustrated we are. The less confidence we have, the more angry we become - because we get frustrated with the fact that we can't get the things that we want. Like why isn't that happening? Right? So when we pep talk, when we're telling ourselves everything is super awesome, not just that it's going to be okay - Being okay is great. But that kind of seems like it's in the future and you got to own how amazing you are at this moment in order for the future to kind of fall in line. Do you follow what I'm saying? So as you are pep talking yourself, and you're pep walking through life - I just love that pep talkin' and pep walkin' - I'm gonna have to figure out a song for that by the end of this episode - but when you were going through life pep talking yourself, you are allowing yourself to remain in control. You know what a control freak I am and you should be a control freak too because you are ultimately the one who is in charge of how you react to everything in your life. You're in control. You can be frustrated or angry. You can be blaming and accusatory. You can be, I don't know, feeling guilty, or maybe you're jealous of people. I mean, you have all of these opportunities to experience not so yummy things, right? It's all within your control. So if you choose instead to feel awesome things like supporting some of the people that you actually start out feeling jealous about. Maybe you, instead of feeling angry towards someone, try to understand why they're behaving the way that they do so that you can have compassion. If it's time for you to forgive somebody, recognize that, you know, forgiving doesn't mean forgetting. You need to learn from the situations that you've been put in, so that you know how to react later on. So pep talking can help you work through all of these things. Like you're starting to get angry, and you go, "Wait a minute, you know what, you're the one in control, there's no need and getting angry, it's going to bring up your blood pressure, your immune system is going to take a hit. I mean, being angry is not a good thing for you, right? So you should right now just forgive, have compassion. This person has been through a lot." You see what I'm saying? This, this is how you can pep talk yourself. Basically, like you're talking to your best friend, which by the way, you should be your best friend. That's kind of important for feeling good about yourself as you're moving through life. But pep talkin you is the right way to go. Now, I don't know why sometimes I get in my feeds, information about crimes and things like that. And one of the things that shows up probably because I've watched a video at some point about this type of subject, but one of the things that shows up is stuff about child abuse and it's upsetting to me, because I don't really care to see some of the stories. And I'll tell you why. Now, child abuse can take all different forms, but the one that affects me the most is the kind that leaves the child feeling that no one loves them. And that, honestly, any form of child abuse can lead to that type of feeling so when those videos show up in my feed on social media, I just I don't even watch because it affects me so deeply. The pain of recognizing that a child is not feeling loved, oh my gosh. And I think about some of the people that I work with, some of the people that come to my retreats, or even listen to this podcast and some of the experiences that they've had in their lives where they felt abused at some point. And maybe that's actually led them to feel guilty. Like maybe they feel that they were the ones that created the situations that made them feel like they were being abused. And I think,"oh my gosh, at some point, this lovely human as a child felt unloved." And so now when I say something like, "you got a pep talk yourself," they literally don't know how, and or they feel like they're not worthy of a pep talk. So, listen to my words right now. That is simply not true. You are worthy of a pep talk, you are worthy of hearing that you are amazing. You are worthy of hearing that there are alternate ways of expressing yourself or processing some of the pains that you are feeling. When someone isn't treating you well, you're actually doing yourself a favor by not getting angry with them. You are doing yourself a favor first by saying, "oh, okay, so I'm going to have compassion and then I'm going to, gosh, any number of things, I'm going to walk away, I'm going to talk to them about the feelings that I'm having, I'm going to ask them to no longer talk to me that way or treat me that way." You see, when you start from a place of more more compassion for yourself, it becomes easier to deal with the situation. And it even becomes easier to show more compassion toward the other people. And you may say to me, why would I want to show compassion to someone who's not treating me well? Well, a lot of times the people who aren't treating you well now, they were those children who felt unloved at some point in their lives. This is one of the reasons why I have such a difficult time with some of the stuff that we see on social media right now, where people are just bashing one another or hating one another or canceling people without hearing their stories, without taking the time to understand some of the things that they feel or they think are some of the beliefs that they have. This this is very troubling to me because we all have experienced moments when we didn't feel adequate and so when we're canceling people, we're essentially canceling ourselves. We're not giving ourselves compassion, and we're not extending the compassion to other people. This is very troubling. Down deep we all understand stands that we are connected to one another You are connected to me, I am connected to the person next to me We are all connected to one another. And when we hurt ourselves, we hurt the people around us. When we hurt the people around us, we are hurting ourselves. This is how it works. Show compassion to you first. Pep talk you. Pep talk, so you can pep walk. I just really love that I'm gonna have to say that a few times in this episode. But it's time to like really own how amazing some of the simple things are that you do. Like, you know, there are times where I've got to plan out a whole course and it gets super complicated and I and I feel proud of all the work that I'm doing. But I gotta tell you, it's normally the times when I'm not working on something so complicated that I need more pep talking. Why? Because it doesn't feel like I'm accomplishing much. Maybe I'm just creating a list of I don't know, some of the things that I wish to do over the next year. Well, that's helpful so that we can come up with a game plan, it's not really something that's like, oh, my gosh, I've got the entire content down now or I've got everything written out for my retreat, I am totally set. You know, it's it's, it's something that's big in some respects, but very minor in the day to day. And so I need to pep talk myself even more. And then there'll be things like, I don't know, Thanksgiving dinner. Thanksgiving is coming so I'm kind of thinking about this, because there are a lot of things that can throw a wrench in Thanksgiving this year. And I recognize you know, I've got kind of this schedule that I've been following since 2006. I kid you not. And then on the schedule, it's, you know, start the turkey at this time using this pan and using this serving spoon. And that may seem you like Control Freak to the max, but the thing is, it allows me to kind of take everything out, lay it all out, have it all ready and prepared so that I have less stress as I'm trying to get things done. And the pep talk might have happened in 2006. Like wow, this is awesome. You did this whole schedule thing and you rock. It might have happened then but it's already done so literally my pep talks on Thanksgivings are kind of like okay, well, I'm just gonna get started now and I'm sure everything will turn out fine. I'm missing the boat. You know what I'm saying? It's the little stuff like wow, Turkey got done on time. Wow, look at this gravy. There aren't too many lumps. It's the little stuff that you need to celebrate, amplify that inner voice that says you're amazing. While you were giving yourself your pep talks. Don't listen to any of the negativity. You don't need it. I don't need it. Nobody means it. Right? You don't need to hear. " oh, I didn't get the turkey out on time." Or, "look at how many lumps there are, nobody's gonna even be able to eat this." Like that's not even going to help you at all. So just quiet all those yucky voices and go with amplifying the inner voice that says you are amazing. Pep talks. Pep talks every hour of the day. That is exactly what you need in order to have an amplification of the beauty and the power that is within you. Are you enjoying Wisdom & Chocolate? Then I encourage you to share this podcast with a friend. Make sure that you're sharing with them all of the love and peace and grace that you get from this podcast every single week. Reach out and share chocolate with a friend. There is no need to wait until the beginning of the year or the beginning of the summer to start a new fitness routine. I've got the best place for you to start a fitness routine right now. And that's it Jackie Hooper yoga. This is what you do. You head over to her website, you use the promo code free trial, and you can try one class for free from your own home. It is absolutely amazing. And if you've never done yoga before, let me tell you, it's not just a fitness program for your body, it's a fitness program for the inside as well. It helps you to lower your stress and helps you to feel better and more positively about your day. So head over to the website and the link is down below in the notes, but it's app.arketa.co/jackiehooperyoga, choose your class, use the promo code free trial,and then see how awesome it can be How to take a yoga class from home with an awesome instructor who is sure to get you loving yoga in no time. There is one simple equation that holds the secret to an empowered life. It's called the I AM Equation, a powerful online course at BetsDanko.Com, dedicated to creating real transformative change through self celebration. Celebrate, motivate, and empower. It's that simple. The solution to the equation is personal transformation, the I AM Equation at BetsDanko.Com. Plug your life into the equation at BetsDanko.com. So you may not know this, but I am in, sort of this, this small studio that I use for many different things. I record my courses in here. I record my meditations in here. I do a lot of the work for my monthly membership in here. And it kind of has multiple purposes, like I do a lot of things in here in this tiny little space, and just one of those purposes is recording this podcast. I'm super happy to have this space. But one of the things that I love the most about it is that it literally is a building that is outside of my home. And so, I you know, I get up in the morning and get myself ready and I come out to work. It's just like going to an office, but I literally walk several feet to get to my office. And then at lunchtime, I have the opportunity to go back to the house to create yumminess that will help sustain me through the rest of my day. And one of the things that I like to make, sometimes in lunchtime, but most of the time in the evening when I'm done working, is an avocado mousse. And of course we are at the chocolate moment. So I'm going to spend some time talking about this avocado mousse. And I'm also going to put the recipe down at the bottom because you just have to try this. I try to eat if I'm gonna have chocolate, I try to eat as healthy chocolate as I possibly can. And I try to also keep the quantities pretty darn low. Because you know, anything that is yummy that you eat in excess can end up causing you some difficulty. And I don't really want to do that. So I also am not such a fan of milk chocolate, I really love dark chocolate. So when I can have control over how that dark chocolate is made, and really make it super, super, super healthy, then I want to do that. And that's what this chocolate avocado mousse is. It's like for me, it is a dessert, but I feel good about it. I don't feel guilty about it. In fact, I put this in my Gluten free cookbook on my website because I was just so sure that many many, many people would love this and embrace it. And I've seen different versions of this recipe on Pinterest and things of that sort, but I'm telling you, I have totally nailed it. It's a really, really, really good. It includes avocado, of course, cacao honey, cherries, and you know a little bit of a liquid to make sure that everything will blend. Ooh, it is so so so good. Can you hear, I mean, these are all ingredients that we can pronounce, that we know what they are, and we know where they came from. Isn't that super awesome? When you take control of your sweets and dietary choices, oh, I used that word control again, this is another thing you can be a control freak about - making your own food, seeing the ingredients, knowing what they are, being able to pronounce the things that are going into the dish. And if you're like, "oh, it just takes too much time, I don't like cooking," there are so many recipes that just could be made in 20 minutes that are so super healthy for you. I really encourage you trying that. And if, you know, it takes a little bit of chocolate for you Today's chocolate moment is accompanied by, Take Control Of to feel like you're even willing to try something like that, then look down below because the recipe for avocado mousse from You In A Loving, Giving, and Graceful way. And that's pretty my Gluten free cookbook is down there. Just try it out. Just try it out. See if you love it - and I'm pretty sure you will. much what I was just recommending. If you take control of you in a loving giving and graceful way, then fixing yourself a meal is something that you learn to enjoy. And if you're a person who says, "well I don't know how to cook," well, you know, most cookbooks have directions and some of them are actually made for beginners so the wording is really simple to follow. And I just really recommend that you try it. Go for it. Make food that is healthy for you. And if you're a person who has a lot of sensitivities and allergies like I do, you may feel just overwhelmed with trying to do these things. But I'm telling you, all of the things you need are available in stores. And some of these things, which used to be way too expensive, are only located at a place like Whole Foods, they're carried in pretty reasonably priced stores now. So it makes it a lot easier to fix the things that maybe in the past, you were purchasing premade. I definitely recommend it. You got to think long term when you're looking at your life and creating happiness. And when you're taking care of your body and you're feeding yourself really healthy, yummy things, long term, your immune system is going to be stronger and how you weather disease is going to be stronger. And then you can make a choice of whether or not you want to cheat every once in a while and get something that's pre made. All of this is totally up to you, you know you are totally in control it but I do recommend that you look into how to cook things for yourself and how that will benefit you in the long run. And it's the same when it comes to your mental states and how productive you are. If you set yourself up for success, if you're doing the pep talking, if you're doing the pep walking, if you're really taking care of who you are on the inside and how you talk to yourself, the long term will really serve you, you will feel that you are more successful as you move through life. And success is judged in all different ways. So I'm not promising you that you're tomorrow going to start making$200,000 a year or anything like that success comes from within. So how you view things will actually help you to feel successful or not successful. Choose the thing that helps you feel successful? And why are you going to want to do that. Because in the long term, you feel better about yourself and you feel better about your place in the world. So let me let me give you a little bit of an example. You know, we're coming out of this hole COVID time and I think then I alluded to some of the stuff that our family went through because we're mostly in the entertainment industry. And the entertainment industry is pretty much closed down and a lot of it is still closed down. So making a living bringing in a wage was difficult for some time. So now we are in this place where we can make plans long term plans for putting yourselves back on a strong financial path. And in doing that, that kind of prolongs how long we have to pinch pennies. Now some might go Oh, yes, yeah, we've got a paycheck coming in, I want to buy a new dress, I want to you know, go out with my friends, I want to go out to dinner, you know, because it's been so long since you've been able to do that. I mean, I think that that's an understandable way of reacting when you finally bring in a wage. But I want to set myself up for the long term, I want to make sure that moving forward, we are secure, and we're feeling good about things. I want to feel like a success in this area. So I actually have been sitting down and churning it out what bills are going to be paid when when are we going to take care of this? When are we going to take care of that what things can wait until next year. And it's not just bills, it's you know, fixing the house, there are different things that you know, have to wait when you don't have a good wage coming in. And so this is putting me on a stronger and more secure path. And it's important that I do this right now. So that moving forward, I am feeling more confident. You're going to take control of you in a loving giving and graceful way. And this is one of the ways that I'm doing it. I eat healthy food, I try to cook the things that I am going to be eating, I'm getting my financial life in order, I'm getting my business life in order. There are different things that I'm putting in place because I want to be giving myself a pep talk every step of the way. Changing my inner wording to loving giving and graceful things and then allowing my path to mirror that is a way of pep talking myself or setting myself up for bigger, deeper and more exciting pep talks. You gotta amplify the inner voice that says you are amazing. And then if you can allow that to reflect out into your life. That's super awesome. Take control of you in a loving and giving and graceful way, think long term so that you can feel stronger about the path that lies ahead. Looking for a way to help support BetsDanko.Com and Wisdom& Chocolate? Head down to the bottom of the podcast description. Click on, Buy Me A Coffee. That will take you to the website, Buy Me A Coffee, where you can make a donation to help support everything that we do here. And of course, we dedicate everything we do to celebrating you. So thank you for helping us do exactly that. You can follow a new path, you can feel empowered by your choices, and you can celebrate you every single week. Join me in an unforgettable journey of self empowerment with an uplifting soul quenching program created just for you. It's here. So head over to BetsDanko.Com and sign up for Celebrate You, the monthly membership that literally celebrates you. Pep Talk when things are shutting you down, start pep walkin' and own in the town. I did it, I did it, I came up with a little song about our subject matter today. I knew it was there. I knew that I was hearing it somewhere in the back of my mind and now you guys got to hear it. How lovely is that? So now we're at the celebration moment, which is a wonderful time to bring in music, so that was just perfect, and our celebration moment is this, when fear creeps in, it is super important that we go, "uh uh, not today, I'm leading with love." So let's be real for a moment, because there are literally hundreds, maybe even 1000s of studies that have been done on how fear affects humans and animals, honestly. And there are probably some that are about plant life, because I'm sure somebody has figured out how a tree feels fear. I don't know how that is I you know, I have to stay within my lane, which is personal development. And I don't know a lot about how a tree thinks. But I do know that when people are overcome with fear, it closes off their energy. They have a tendency to kind of shut down. They don't really interact with the world around them in the same way. And there are a lot of reasons for that. And the one that is kind of the most troubling to me is that it actually impairs your judgment. There are different sections of your brain and there are certain sections that kind of get amplified and other sections that kind of shut down. And I don't know about you, but to hear that part of my brain is going to shut down when I'm fearful, doesn't sound like a good thing to me. I want to be completely aware and in the moment if I'm feeling fear. I want to know that I can figure out how to get out of this situation and that's going to be hard to do if your judgment is impaired. Another thing that fear does, which is going to kind of strike a nerve for all of us humans living on the earth right now, is that it actually weakens your immune system. So now think about this for a second. Here we are, we're going about our everyday lives and all of a sudden there's an announcement. There's this pandemic going on. It could kill ya. You need to stay in your homes, don't have any contact with anyone. And of course, a lot of us were put in a position of fear. So now we've got fear, and we are impairing our immune system - weakening it - because we are feeling fear. And that fear also led to an impairment in judgment for a lot of people. And then you've got the whole, "oh my gosh, I can't go out in public. I can't go shopping. I can't do this. I can't do that." So you're not even giving yourself loving things like an avocado mousse. You're doing nothing to help serve and take care of your well being, physical and mental well being. It kind of became this cycle that we all got caught up in. I'm afraid, I need, I am afraid, I need, I am afraid,I need - it just kept going back and forth and back and forth. And can you imagine just how much weaker that immune system got inside of that lovely little body of yours during that time? Are you still living in fear? Have you recognized the things that you can overcome as opposed to the things that need attention so that you don't need to live in fear? Let's strengthen that immune system. Fear is not your friend. It raises your stress levels. It raises your cortisol levels. So if you are a person who was stuck at home and eating less but you gained weight, well, that came from the stress which came from the fear. This is how all of this stuff works. Fear is not a good thing. It is an indication of separation, separation from the light inside of you. It's a loss of faith. When you lose faith, you become fearful because you feel as though nothing is there as your safety net. So let's change all that. Right? Let's change that. Pep talking, Pep walking. Recognize the light inside of yourself. Feel compassion for you, so that you can feel compassion for the people around you. The more compassion that is out into the world, the higher the vibration is around all of us. And what happens when that happens? We become happier and healthier, and stronger. This is all good. The more hate we project out into the world by canceling people or getting angry about different situations in your life, Ugh no, it creates a process of fear. If you remember, when you are feeling separation, you lose faith, which leads to fear, which leads to anger, which leads to feeling judgmental, which leads to... like it just keeps spiraling into stuff that does not serve you. So right now, get rid of that fear. Oh my gosh!! When it's creeping in, it is so important that you literally stop it and go, "No, not today. Uh uh. I am leading with love." Amplify that inner voice that tells you you're amazing. Start with amplifying that kind of love, talking with that kind of love, leading with that kind of love. Be the example by taking control of you in a loving, giving, and graceful way. You're worth it. Oh my gosh. And if that little voice inside of you is not reminding you that you are worth it, you need to sit that little voice down and correct it - and correct it right now. Fear is not your friend. Lead with love. If you'd like me to wrap a little wisdom around your favorite chocolate, reach out and let me know. Just write a little comment. Let me know what your chocolate is and where you're writing from and I will find a way to weave it into one of my podcasts. And I'll even give you a shout out so people know that it came specially from you. Check out everything that BetsDanko.Com has to offer at BetsDanko.com If you're on social media, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter, you can follow me and BetsDanko.Com and keep up to date on all the little bits of Wisdom & Chocolate that I post Monday through Friday. Subscribe to this podcast and start enjoying your weekly dose of Celebrating You with Bets Danko. And while you're at it, if you're enjoying Wisdom & Chocolate please take a moment and share with a friend. Go ahead, tag a friend today with Wisdom & Chocolate and get them started on a path of self celebration. Experience the wisdom that helps to motivate and empower you in relationships, business, family and most importantly, self celebration. Getting the picture. It's wisdom and it's all about you. Want to hear the chocolate? Tune into Wisdom & Chocolate weekly

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